Tuesday, February 5, 2013

The Fun Is Always On The Other Side Of . . .

I'm a huge fan of Tina Fey. Smart, funny, talented, and did I say funny? And pretty fabulous looking too. At 42, she looks better than ever:

Gorgeous at the 2013 Golden Globes

She's got some ideas worth pondering too. I just read an article about Tina's philosophy of "yes" and it hooked me in. "The fun is always on the other side of a yes", she says.

"A couple of times I've been called on to do things -- jobs or whatever -- where I've felt, Maybe I'm not quite ready. Maybe it's a little early for this to happen to me. But the rules are so ingrained. "Say yes, and you'll figure it out afterward" has helped me to be more adventurous. It has definitely helped me be less afraid."

How often do I say "no" before I even consider the possibilities on the other side? Moonlight walk on the beach: I might be too tired or too chilly. Leather skirt above the knee: I'm too old for that look. Vacation in NYC: I always say "yes" to that, and the fun never stops.

Tina goes on to say: "And even if you abandon one idea for another one, saying yes allows you to move forward." So maybe not the leather skirt but a denim one, and as short as I like. And with teal tights if the mood is right.

I know what you're thinking: women can say "yes" too often, and become burdened with responsibilities. The other struggle is to learn to say "no" to unreasonable requests and demands. We have to do that to maintain our sanity and our dignity. I try to do it once a day!

And today I am going to practice "yes"-ing the possibilities. Who knows where I'll go?

26 comments:

  1. I like this idea. I also think Tina Fey look amazing and is crazy funny.

    bisous
    Suzanne

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  2. Great post, Patti, and so true! It reminds me to the quote which is accredited to Coco C. - I don't regret anything in my life except what I have missed to do.
    To say no to the pain in the neck is also important. It saves time for the "adventures".

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  3. Have you read her book "Bossy Pants"? I liked Tina before but after reading her book I LOVE her!!! Favorite quote "Bitches get stuff done."
    Connie*

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  4. I like Tina Fey too & looks fabulous....different spin on yes-ing....like it!

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  5. This is food for thought.  I never really looked at it that way.

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  6. Sue @ A Colourful CanvasFebruary 5, 2013 at 1:30 PM

    The way Tina has phrased it, and the examples that you have given, make me want to jump on the Yes train.  The thing is, I say yes to things that just stress me out.  Just recently, I reversed a few yes answers, and felt such a big wave of relief after.  It was agony before, simply because I hate to back out of something I've committed to.  So....I need to be judicious about my yeses so I can find that fun on the other side.

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  7. I can't say that I'm a Tina Fey fan, but I sure like her attitude!

    Monica
    www.pear-shaped-gal.com

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  9. PinkcheetahvintageFebruary 5, 2013 at 5:30 PM

    Dang!! Tina is looking good!  NYC vacays are the hubby's and my favorite--  we always have a blast there :)

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  10. That is one awesome dress she's wearing. And failure to say yes to things out of fear is probably my biggest regret, so this is excellent advice for me. Heh. Maybe I used up all my sense of adventure in the whole emigrating/getting married thing fifteen-odd years ago.

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  11. Tina makes a good point, thanks for highlighting it. I need to say yes more, and stop worrying so much. I will try. This is the year!

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  12. SO true!  We don't always consider the blessings of a situation or something unexpected that may arise!

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  13. What an inspiring post...I know how many things I regret passing up and I'm trying to go for the gusto more these days. I was the kid who didn't get the courage to dance until the last dance in junior high--and by then, it was nearly too late! Thanks for letting me feature you on the blog. Your post goes up next week!

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  14. There was a British man who decided to say yes to everything for a year, and then he wrote about it, and then did a TV program about it, and it has opened all kinds of doors for him. I wouldn't have become acquainted with my husband if I hadn't said yes to a drink when we met in a restaurant! I think a positive attitude will bring positive results.

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  15. very pretty dress! I love your post - very well written and yes-ing is great!

    Lyosha
    Inside and Outside Blog
    P.S. I've just said 'yes' to follow you

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  16. Great post Patti!! i'm learning to say NO to stuff that will stress me and YES to the FUN!!

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  17. I think I most need to learn to say yes to myself. I.e. yes to stopping work for a minute to get a drink of water. Yes to a restful evening when I need one. Yes to taking time and effort to do some yoga. Yes to expressing how I feel.

    I'm quite open to taking risks and trying new things and I'm quite happy saying no to unreasonable demands from others (unless they're at work, then I need to negotiate instead of saying a flat no) but I make unreasonable demands on myself all day every day...

    Thanks for the thoughful post and for making me think. :)

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  18. It is so true that women struggle with saying "no." Years ago, I read an article, which I believe was written by Oprah, in which she shared having this same struggle. She was so busy saying yes to the wrong things in order to please everyone else that her own needs were completely ignored. She shared her technique for breaking the cycle. She never gives an immediate answer. She says that she will check her schedule and get right back to them. By hanging up or walking away for a few minutes she can do the necessary soul searching first. If the best answer for her is "No" she tells the person very politely, " I'm sorry but that doesn't work for me right now." No drawn out explanations or agonized apologies. Concise and to the point. That simple technique gave her the freedom to only say yes to those opportunities that spoke to her heart.

    I've used this technique many times and it works perfectly!

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  19. Love what she is saying and it's true we are often afraid to do or try something new or maybe we are not ready for, getting out of our comfort zone, God knows i have been doing that lately, loosing my job, looking for work, figuring out and trying new possibilities and you know what so far it's all good
    Keep an open mind and listen to your inner voice i say -

    Ariane x

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  20. Great post, patti. Reminds me of the Vogue article this month about Nan Kempner and the 'art of having fun.' thanks!

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